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Opening up is a scam ?!

“Guys don’t open up, it’s a scam!’

Well I guess that’s the old me talking, I might have changed just a bit and there were reasons why I didn’t open up but now I see the negative effects of not effectively expressing yourself.

Not opening up and *gulp*  expressing  feelings can be detrimental to one’s mental health. Let me make this clear. It doesn’t make you a bad guy for not speaking about certain things, it’s true you can’t just be saying anything to anyone just for the sake of it. However, suppressing everything isn’t healthy.

“Silence does not always mark wisdom.” ― Samuel Taylor Coleridge 

I’ve always thought what does talking to people about your problems and fears actually do for you? More time they can’t even help. I guess it is nice to have someone that listens to you, but sometimes you just cant get those words out

*Alexa play Roddy Ricch – Cant Express*

I think the main problem for people like myself who struggle to “open up” is having people / a person that you can wholeheartedly trust. You want to be confident that whatever you say will stay safe with them and they are not going judge you. I guess a lot of us have been closed off since having putting trust in the wrong people in the past but there are people that have genuine care for you and even sometimes they misunderstand you. Unfortunately our loved ones are not mind readers so you gotta speak up and express yourself if you are looking to be understood.

“If you never bother to say the words, why should anyone believe you ever felt them?” Richelle E. Goodrich,

“When you give yourself permission to communicate what matters to you in every situation you will have peace despite rejection or disapproval. Putting a voice to your soul helps you to let go of the negative energy of fear and regret.” ― Shannon L. Alder

I’ve definitely been an opening up is a scam merchant in the past, and I know I definitely did have my reasons. But you know what I’m changing that, I don’t want to be screaming opening up is a scam as a grown man as you can’t allow one traumatic or bad experience to have a hold over you forever. For myself on this never ending walk with Christ I’m putting my faith and trust in Him as He will always be there so I can talk to Him at all times. I’m not writing this to tell you that you should start to tell everyone your business LOL believe me, I just know that suppressing everything isn’t healthy at all, hope we all find peace in the end.

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20/20 Vision 24/7?

Hello All and Happy New Year! I know I’m eleven days late LOL!

It’s the start of a new year and the start of a new decade some may say this may be the most defining one in our lives where we graduate, begin are careers, start our own families, etc.

I’d like to believe we all have goals we would like to achieve this year, I know I do! Whether it’s an educational goal, financial or even personal goal, like acquiring a driving license no goal is too big or too small. Your goals are about …YOU, these goals should scare you a little, I wouldn’t consider a goal something that can be easily achieved, hard work, and consistency is definitely involved in the process of achieving a goal.

A goal should scare you a little, and excite you a lot.― Joe Vitale

The hardest thing about attaining a goal for a lot of people is remaining motivated throughout the process of attaining a goal. Sometimes we lose motivation and that hinders us and may even cause us to alter the goal originally set to something that can be easily achieved so we don’t get that sense of failure. Or sometimes we even just forget about the goal completely. In the end, we’re all human and there are times that we lack motivation and confidence to achieve goals we have set for ourselves. Myself for example; whenever I get close to a deadline I begin to get anxious and nervous, no matter how much work I know I have put in, I begin to doubt myself and the work I have produced.

“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, and others make it happen.”―Michael Jordan

A bit of advice from me is to remember why you chose this goal and what achieving this goal would bring to you so we regain that focus and drive. It is important not to lose sight and allow fear of failure to overcome us. Fear is not an option when we are pursuing our goals, we must endeavour to reach these goals we have set ourselves even if we end up failing, just like the cliché saying something along the lines of “doesn’t matter how many times you fall it’s about how many times you can get back up“. *Alexa play Meek Mill – Wins & Losses*.

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.— Robert F. Kennedy

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Some of the ways you can remain motivated:

  • As well as your large goals for the year, throughout the year set small measurable goals
  • Celebrate your small wins
  • Regular reflection
  • Read things like this – So important what we feed our minds with
  • Do not be too hard on yourself

In the end, we all want THAT feeling of reaching a goal. A feeling that really is unmatched. The relief and joy of finally reaching something you have worked so hard for and seeing others proud of you is just a GOAT feeling. God willing we all have this feeling throughout and especially at the end of the year!!

You’ve just got to persevere if you really want to achieve something. At the same time don’t put too much pressure on yourself, as it’s okay to take breaks. Working on something that means a lot to you all the time can sometimes feel overwhelming. Spend time relaxing, get your mind off it by doing something you love. Then when you are recharged… go again and repeat.

All who have accomplished great things have had a great aim, have fixed their gaze on a goal which was high, one which sometimes seemed impossible. —Orison Swett Marden

Good luck for the year.

David A